No but actually watching I Saw the TV Glow for the first time really hit me so hard bcus it truly described exactly how I was feeling in a way that I understood. Like there was always just a sense of “wrongness” growing up, like I was being a girl wrong. It wasn’t until I cut my hair (The 2016 Pixie Cut of Doom) that I realized something more was there. My friend bought me a binder and it didn’t fit and I took it as a sign that it wasn’t meant to be. I doubled down a lot for a few years and presented in an overly feminine as a way to try and hide that part of myself bcus it was so scary. There were times when I cut my hair short again and I felt like myself just to grow it back out and feel miserable. It wasn’t until 2020 that I bought my first binder with my own money that I realized that it wasn’t just something I could hide. This was how I wanted to be. It took a little more time to stop pushing the hyper femininity and just be who I wanted, but I got there. I get my hair cut regularly now. I started to buy clothes that I felt comfortable existing in. I started binding outside of my room. I stopped worrying if people would care. The TV never stopped glowing. I was listening to it from the other room, waiting. - - - #isttvg#isawthetvglow#trans#hethey#transmasc#nonbinary